Wednesday, September 21, 2016

So What Wednesday!?

I can't even believe it myself!  

Ready, set, go!

So What if (with a very straight face) I inquired on the idea of an adult gymnastics class to the gymnastics coach of the little one.    I basically said it's not fair that us crazy moms that used to love gymnastics have zero options for fun filled flipping and shenanigans.      He empathized and I swear I saw something in his eyes that said "Dang, I wish this was my idea..."   I kid (kinda), but seriously...  Stay tuned.  I'm not giving up and this may be a new "thing."     

So What if I'm straight up addicted to Draft Kings?    You guys, I feel like I may need to become a professional at betting on football.    I mean... 8th place out of 1,200 teams?  159th place out of 29,000!?      Sorry, but this can't be luck.   Yes, I realize these are the words of every  gambler.   But seriously.   What if this is where my natural talent lies and I've missed my calling?   (okay, I can't even type that part with a straight face.  Yet, the gymnastic thing.. poker face and all business.)  

So What if the Brad / Angelina split is already boring me?      I hate to quote a very raunchy instagrammer but he kinda said it best....  In summary, and in the G rated version...    " If a ridiculously good looking couple with symmetrical faces, perfect body parts,  and enough money to move to outer space can't be happy,  we're all SOL." 

So What if I haven't really watched a real TV show in months but am suddenly obsessed with the new show called This is Us?    If you missed the pilot last night... it airs again on Saturday.   Do yourself a large and at least set the DVR, or firestick, or sling,  or whatever it is everyone is doing these days.      Then come back so we can talk about it.  

So What if I panic on the regular about how tall and grown up my almost 10 year old is?   And how little/ yet big the 6 year old is?    Ladies with kids, I know you get me.  
    Ladies without kids, one day if/ when  you have kiddos, I promise you'll feel the panic too.    It's universal.    Time flies and no one believes it until they're in the depths of trying to raise kind, well rounded humans.    Then the panic of the time flying sets in.     
You know the sweet little elderly lady in the grocery store who smiles at you and your  monkeys (who are likely probably wearing you out at that exact moment and you're wondering why you can't just go buy what you need in peace without explaining why we aren't buying gummy bears in bulk 10 minutes before dinner)? 
Yes,  that lady.   Then she says "aww.. enjoy them.. they grow up so fast.  Mine sure did."  
And even then, you barely believe the lady because you're tired and they're acting like toddlers, which is basically the equivalent of owning your own real life monkey.  Oh and the days are long but the years are short but you don't know any of this yet.      
Then when you least expect it, something happens and the days get shorter and the kids get taller and start wiping their own butts and wanting to shop at Justice and then... the panic sets in.   The panic of "Wow, this actually IS all  going too fast and am I soaking it all in enough?  What will they remember?   Is this enough?  Oh no!  Panic!"    

...See how that all happens??

So What if I'm now on a steroid for this God-forsaken poison ivy and it's barely making a dent?   Clearly, this was high octane Ivy I got tangled up in.   I know you're all on the edge of your seats with my poison ivy saga but seriously, there's gotta be another way.

ps-   Next 24 DC starts October 3rd.   More on that to come!

Love ya, miss ya, mean it!

1 comment:

  1. I am in LOVE with This is Us! And... I cannot believe it's been 10 years (almost) since K was born!! At least you are reverse aging.. no joke. Tell me your secrets! :)